Idea for Handling Unkindness

I continue to see and hear about unkindness and present a challenge to you, if you relate.

Recent unkindnesses witnessed in my life and friend’s lives:

You just lost your parent and someone pretty much tells you to “buck up, everything will be back to normal soon.”

You buy a gift for a friend and instead of a simple thank you, they complain about it.

You need compassion because you just experienced something you find hard to handle, and your family member not only doesn’t give compassion, but compounds your sadness by being mean in words and actions.

You’re OK at being kind and loving another person, but that person just “takes” and only talks about themselves, not realizing “And how are you?” goes a long way.

If you’re like me, you may be able to handle an unkind act or two, with forgiveness and grace, but when you are bombarded, what can you do?

Here’s my idea:

Create a kindness coin jar!

Figure out an amount like a nickel, dime, quarter, and each time someone is unkind in your world, put that coin into the glass/jar/vase.

When it is full, do something with the money. Donate it to charity, buy yourself a treat, etc.

This turns the nasty issue, into kindness! If you have any creative ways to handle unkindness, please share.

34 thoughts on “Idea for Handling Unkindness”

  1. Great idea! The only thing we can control about others actions is the way we react. And this is a creative and constructive way to keep our composure and change our focus. Thanks!

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      1. We shall see! 🙂 I’m sure God has picked specific neighbors because they come along with the home He gave us. Whether they will be friendly or a challenging ministry opportunity remains to be seen. Thank you for hoping for the best for me, my friend!

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      1. When I experience unkindness, my ideal reaction that I hope to always have is to take my hurt feeling to the Lord and only then I can be assured that I do not let annoyance or hurt drive my actions. But alas I do not always react like that. I have been working with intentionality in reminding myself to reflect Christ in every situation especially unjust ones.

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  3. I LOVE your idea, Marla!!! For me, it’s a matter of “accumulated unkindness” from one person at a time usually (although they can also pile up if more than one person is shooting arrows, haha). For example, I have a meeting tomorrow with a person whom I must get along with…but I’ve accumulated resentment toward her because I feel she’s taken unfair advantage of my goodwill, consideration and generous patience.

    (This is probably sharing too much, but anyway–I spent all day yesterday with the Lord, asking Him to help me with my attitude…so I don’t make the situation worse tomorrow.) I confess that I hold onto hurts (NOT because I want to–it’s NOT Fun!); and don’t forgive easily…even though I’m well aware that God gives me plenty of grace and I should share it!!

    So I don’t have any brilliant ideas to offer you–but I empathize with what you’ve shared. And again, your idea of the jar is surely God-inspired! I send you Love, and pray with earnest confidence that God will pour abundant blessings on your week. Let’s stay connected, shall we, Sister?💖

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    1. Thank you Zelda. I love hearing your story! It shows me a couple of things. One is that I relate so much and you prove humans go through similar struggles. Two is you know what God wants from us, what His promises are and how He takes care of us, but in our broken down sinful nature, we still have issues. Three is that you know God and the Holy Spirit in you is heightened, meaning your pride isn’t allowing you to think you’re perfect. Four is asking God for help. I’m just reading the Bible, studying Matthew on my own and that is what’s helping the most. Hearing Jesus words are my comfort. I will watch out for the abundant blessing you prayed for me. Thank you. 🥰 Please let me know how the meeting went. I think it’s happened and I didn’t get to pray for you.

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      1. Thank you, Marla–your words are a balm to me this morning, much appreciated. The meeting in is about an hour and a half–so you could still pray for me 🙂 And YES, be watching for God’s boatload of blessings coming your way!! ❤ I'm eager/excited to hear your report as they arrive!

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            2. I’m struggling, feeling low–but clinging to the Lord. Thanks much for asking, and your prayers. God works everything out for our good–that’s His promise, and we have to stand on it and declare it!! Blessings to you, my dear–how are things going for YOU?

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            3. Oh no, I’m sorry you’re feeling low. I care. I will continue to pray you see Jesus work. I had a huge trauma this week and saw Jesus work in what looked like there was no hope! You prayed this! I saw His blessings and its only mid-week! Thank you! ❤❤❤

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            4. Oh my, what a testimony–bless your heart, Marla!! Sometime the Lord works really fast…sometimes we need to be still and wait on Him<3 I'm honored to pray for you daily!! And grateful for your prayers too, Sister ❤

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  6. I have found that when I pray for “unkind drivers” BEFORE I start my car, it helps me realize they NEED Jesus more than my “correction” of their bad driving!
    ❤️&🙏, c.a.

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      1. Lex is filling up with “infill” construction, but over the lines into Jessamine and Scott counties, LOTS of new subdivisions!
        They say we are becoming the “Ft. Lauderdale” of the Midwest, with lots of retirees moving in; low crime rate, low cost of living, medium weather, parks and fresh air.
        See

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          1. No, I wish! They’re making the big bucks ‘hand over fist!’ 🙃
            Not a lot to see IN Lexington, but we are close to Mammoth Cave, The Natural Bridge, the Creation Museum and the Ark Encounter. And depending on the time of year there are park concerts and shows downtown and in nearby Richmond at EKU.

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  7. Pingback: Idea for Handling Unkindness – Tonya LaLonde

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